Full Heart

I'll keep it short and sweet this eve. 

Our Wilde man said his first word today. I've never experienced such joy. it's amazing to watch him grow. 

He crawled around my feet all night while I made dinner and bopped while I sang the completely incorrect version of 78% of the songs that came on the children's pandora station. 

He looks at you so intently. Almost like he is trying to hard to figure you out and to also tell you how much he loves you. In those moments, I am alive. I give myself a hard time and joke about how stressful being a mom can be- I mean, it's not really a joke. It is stressful, but- these moments where you see your beautiful baby boy curled up in daddy's arms, chomping on the 3rd huge bottle in less than 4 hours, you realize how freaking amazing life and love and his appetite really is. 

I'm thankful for every scary, crazy, wild unknown that led us to the most constant and unconditional love I've ever had.  

This last year was....something else and I'm so thankful for it. 

Okay, mushy gushy-ness over. Here are some cute pictures 

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Hello, My Name is Cray-la

Ames turned 9 months old on the 9th. Just before that we were sent a survey in the mail that asked what developmental milestones our young padawon has accomplished. I had recently had one of my "oh eff it" moments just before this 3 page documents made its way into my hands. I had just said- he's healthy and happy and we're doing great! 

Then I started reading:

    Does your child somtimes, always, or not yet do the following...

      A. Pinch a cheerio with one finger and thumb. 

       Answer: no- he's too busy crawling around and smacking his head on nearby furniture to care about how the cheerio gets into his mouth. 

       B. Look for a toy after you have hidden it. 

       Answer: no- he looks at me as if to say "well that was kind of rude...but I'll move on" and literally moves on to swan dive into the dog water. 

      C. Attempt to grab a cheerio that you have placed inside a water bottle while standing on one leg and playing the violine with the other hand. 

Okay, that may have been a little exaggerated. But by this point in survey I'm stressing out. It's Saturday and I'm trying to figure out how much I can binge teach my kid before his 9 month appointment on Tuesday. Accompanying my boot camp lesson plan is an entire list of "am I doing something wrong?" Or "I really need to be home more, why do I have to be a working mom?!" 

Lance is napping on the couch and wakes up to his crazy wife crawling on the floor with our kiddo, flailing my arms around, shoving water bottles with Cheerios in his face, trying to get him to share toys with me without being asked and pick up small objects as if he had the fine moto skills of a grown adult. I must of said his name 80 times. I felt like Stewart from Mad TV. 

By this time my charades have woke lance up and he's like " hey, babe. Whatcha doing?" And I broke down in tears. I felt so inadequate in that moment. Which is nonsense- but there's no talking any reason into Cray-la (she's my other personality that comes out when I'm stressed about mom stuff). 

I would like to take a moment of silence for all the mommies and daddies out there who have lost nights of sleep stressing over milestones and development hoo-hah- we all know we aren't getting those nights back so...that sucks. You're kiddos are wonderful no matter where they are at. 

Our little bundle is a hoot. He is SUCH a ham. He loves to entertain and is starting to only want to be held by mommy or daddy when he's tired or cranky

He's very eager to walk. He loves to hold your hands and walk around as long as you'll tolerate. He's a clapping machine. He even will clap when he's mad about something. It's kind of funny. He's babbling a lot, no Dadas or mamas yet but he has the sweetest little voice. For the most part he is a pretty independent player. He looks at a toy and bangs it on things and looks at it again and moves it I his hands. I love watching him think. 

He is still up once at night to eat but otherwise he is sleeping well! Now for some cute pictures :)

I Just Have to Pee..

As a parent, your needs are always second to those of your child's. I have come to find that this includes any and all instances where you are seconds from peeing your pants and your child has smacked his head on the wall/fallen from holding onto an unsteady toy/blown out his diaper on the carpet for the 3rd time this week. 

The most recent instance is this very moment. I have spent the last hour and a half trying to get Ames down for his morning nap. Let me draw you a picture. 

8:10am we started with our usual nap time routine, bottle, song, rocking chair, lay down while eyes are rolling to the back of his head. He's dozing off- boom. Time to get some cleaning done so I can hopefully drink my coffee and space out for a half hour before he wakes up. 

8:15am a loud banging starts upstairs 

He's demanding some service! 

"Ma! The meatloaf!"

8:35am painfully loud crying. Lay him back down, give him his binkie and he falls back asleep.  

8:40am he's back up whaling again. 

This process repeats for the next hour 

9:25am he needs to Nap and the only place he has stayed asleep for more than 5 minutes is my arms. And I've had to pee since we started this mother loving fiasco. I have caved. Because if he doesn't sleep now..we are screwed for nap number two and then the whole day is shot. 

I have a mountain of clean, unfolded laundry at my feet, a sleeping baby in my arms that is still breathing heavy from all the crying he did since we began this brawl, and I am going to pee my pants. 

Truthfully, as wonderful as it would be to get the mountain of house work done that is well past due...he NEVER snuggles anymore so for now- I'll embrace the cuddles and binge watch some Netflix. 

I'm behind on blogging. Ames turned 8 months on the 9th and we are experiencing a whole new baby. He's crawling all over the place, pulling himself up on anything and everything, and is breaking a tooth in! What in the heck?! Where did my teeny tiny baby go?!

It's hard to believe that our once 3lb baby is now 16 pounds! 

He is SO social- he visits with everyone at Crossfit in the mornings and just soaks up all the attention he gets. He melts everyone with that toothless smile 

So far he has loved every food we've thrown his way to except peas and bananas by themselves. He prefers to feed himself...that doesn't always go great...

But he loves it so that works. The sleep struggle is real, but that smile helps you forget all about it...most of the time. 

 

The Best Moms Group Ever

Throughout high school I played volleyball, ran track, and danced. My passion was ways dancing but I pretended that I was athletic enough to play volleyball and run track but the truth was; I was too short for volleyball and spent way too much time diving for stray balls that my puiny arms couldn't reach; I am freaking slow so I sucked at track. Period. But I did it because you didn't have to try out haha. 

Dancing was always where I felt at ease and after continuing for a year into college, life got busy and once you are dancing for recreation it's not the same as when you're performing. 

Thus, I entered a new chapter in my life where I tried to find something to fill that passion. Zumba was okay, still not what I wanted. Going to the gym and spending 30 minutes burning 15 calories on the elliptical sucked. And I still wasn't athletic enough for intramural sports. 

Lance started this crazy and intimidating thing called Crossfit and I gave it a big ol stiff arm because, woah. That sounded hard and scary lol. 

Well...then we had Ames and I stood looking at myself in the mirror, just irritated and full of post partum emotions. So I agreed to try this crazy intimidating sport. AND I LOVED IT. 

There's a Fight Club reference that the first rule in Crossfit is always talk about Crossfit and that the second rule is also, to always talk about Crossfit. It's humerous because anyone who is passionate about anything is going to talk about it, a lot. So I shall embrace that and continue talking about it, because it's changed my entire outlook on fitness goals. 

Not only have I regained my confidence, feel comfortable in my own skin again, and FEEL better, but I feel strong. I've never known that feeling before and it

Feels great. It feels great knowing that we are setting a good example for Ames to eventually follow. 

Also, this is better than any other Moms group I could have joined. The people and the community are incredible. It's so  much fun to be around and be apart of such a supportive group of women (and men). But when the lifting is over and we are all somehow breathing normal again, we have the chance to talk about the kiddos and give (or in my case, get) advice. They cheer me on in the workout and they are pretty awesome and supportive moms. 

I'm so thankful that lance and I are a part of this community. I can't wait to raise Ames around such strong, kind, and generous people. 

I'm going to want to remember what I felt like when I first started and I can't wait to see how i feel in a year. 

Dump the Pump- Ames 7 months

Ames hasn't wanted to nurse for around 2 months now. It was a constant battle with so many tears...both ways, so I went to exclusively pumping. As mentioned in previous posts...pumping is my nemisis. NEMISIS! I loathed the process, the cleaning of those tiny parts that are so easily lost, trying to pump when your husband is at work and your baby is screaming at the top of his lungs because he's hungry- yeah. It sucked. And to top it off, Our dietitian had us fortifying because she didn't think the calorie count of my milk was high enough and I wasn't keeping up with Ames for supply so we were supplementing with formula.

After I spent a drive to Lebanon pumping, while on my way to an assessment for work...I had enough. I dumped the pump. I had extreme guilt about this whole process. I felt lazy. Like I wasn't willing to make that sacrifice for Ames. But the fact is, I was miserable, I wasn't sleeping, I was angry. As soon as I was able to realize that it not only wasn't good for me to have that high of stress, but it also wasn't good for Ames to be around it...I dumped it And ohhhh it felt good.

So now we're onto formula and he's already gaining weight better. Hes also trying solids! He loves carrots, squash, sweet potatoes, green beans, and peaches. He does not like peas or rice cereal...but he's a trooper and gives them a try. He loves eating. It's so much fun. I've had to come to realize that eating is not and never will be a clean process so I might as well embrace it lol. 

Ames still fights sleep but I would say that the fights are getting shorter! So that's good. He's slowly working himself into a schedule. Shout out to my babysitters for working with me and writing everything down. Love you guys 😘 

What else? Ah- he's SUPER squirmy. He's rolling from his back to his stomach and inch worms all over the place. He loves the exersaucer and SQUEALING at the top of his lungs. He has the cutest voice and loves to use it. He's a happy giggly baby, loves being around people and is such a ham. 

Life is busy here at the Armstrong house but I can't help but thank my lucky stars when I come home to these sweethearts. 

 

The Sleep Fighting Royal Rumble

Every day during nap time, Ames fights the smallest thought of sleep. He could be two fists deep in his eye balls and still fight falling and staying asleep until he's blue in the face. So far, naps are the worst...he is a cat napper, much liked self when I was a child apparently (so very sorry, mom). After 20 minutes, he's up again and won't go back to sleep for at least another hour and it's usually not a happy hour. 

One would think that since he has such small naps during the day that he would be exhausted at night....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. 

Every night, without fail, he fights going down. We go through our usual bed time routine, lay him down while drowsy like everyone recommends, blah blah blah, and then for the next two hours we are up and down the stairs. He cries for 5 minutes, we put the binkie back in. He cries a little longer, we rock him and soothe him. He cries again, we beg and plead while rocking him and dancing and singing- this child has turned us into a freaking traveling circus! 

Then, by some miracle, we have gotten him to sleep. Naturally while exiting we do a tiny victory dance and PRAY that this time it sticks. That's what we are doing right now...I'm sitting next to Lance on the couch and neither of us are actually paying attention to the movie we are watching because we are afraid that our little bundle is going to start yelling at us again. 

Bedtime is the best/worst time of the day. When he actually stays asleep, it's the few hours that lance and I have to ourselves. If he doesn't...then we spend the last few hours before we go to bed running up and down the stairs like WWE wrestlers tagging each other in and out. 

All joking aside though, Ames is doing really well. He's SO MUCH FUN! Laughing, interactive, rolling, trying solids, trying to copy us. He is amazing. 

He's 6 months old and at our last therapy appointment they said he has fine motor skills and cognition of a 4 1/2 month old ( he's 4 months adjusted) and gross motor skills of a 6 month old! They still want h to gain more weight and grow longer. He's 14lbs and 24 inches long. So we are fortifying his bottles again with formula. The formula isn't a big deal since we have been supplementing ever since his appetite was more than I could keep up with the just exclusively breastfeeding. 

I think he's grown out of his "bathtub" haha

Working Parents

Holy crap, guys- our child does not stop moving. He's hilarious. He takes 20 minute cat naps and then he's back up and wants to be on the ground riding his imaginary bicycle and punching whatever is nearby. Sage has gotten close to lick him a couple times and gets popped in the chops. She sure loves him though. 

I started to think that maybe I was consuming too much caffeine or sugar and he STILL does it even after I cut back! We are screwed when he's mobile. Holy cow. 

Life is pretty crazy these days. It's the good kind of stress though. The kind of busy that puts you in a deep sleep at night. I feel like when we're home we run a million miles a minute- we're catching up on the mountain of laundry from the prior week(s), scrubbing the unknown sticky crap off of the walls, and trying to find time to exercise ourselves as well as our poor hyper dog. 

It's been pretty awesome to watch Ames develope and grow. He's sleeping in his

Crib and is only up once a night. HALLELUJAH! He's talking like crazy! He squeals and giggles, he's so much fun to talk to because he smiles from ear to ear all the time. He's almost 12lbs and has rolls for days 

I've been doing Crossfit at Power Valley since February and I feel the best I've felt- ever. I feel strong, confident, determined, competitive with myself, and motivated. Before, if you would of asked me to get up at 4:30 in the morning to workout I would have laughed at you and  told you to go away. Since February, lance and I have been going 4-5 times a week 3 of those times are 5am classes. We do the baby "rumba" during the week, he hands baby off to me so he can go to the 6am. It's working out well and I'm so glad he introduced it to me. I love being a part of such a strong community. I'm addicted- even when I do this mid- squat